A Year of Writing

 I came across a course entitled "A Year of Writing to Uncover Your Authentic Self." I decided to give it a try -- it's a program that sends a writing prompt every week for a year. I figured it was time to start writing digitally again. I've been on a journey to declutter recently, and I want to move away from the paper journals. Maybe digital isn't a better option -- I find that reading through all of my old journals tend to bring up weird feelings. I write a lot when I'm upset or stressed, so a lot of my writing isn't fun to re-read. But, I figure it will be cathartic in the meantime. It always helps me to get my feelings out on paper. I like to write, and I do know there is something to be said about handwriting things down, but I need to trim down my belongings. I'm tired of carrying so many things with me every time I move somewhere new. I want to become a true minimalist, but it's going to take some time and effort if I actually ever make it. Although I am making progress!

Anyway, the course... let's start with the first week's prompt: Roadblocks. The goal is to explore what obstacles are standing in my way (past, present, or future). So, I guess my first thought is, obstacle to what? Living the life of my dreams? Happiness? Goals? What if I don't have any goals? What if I'm just content living my life exactly how it is? I'm sure that's not the case though. We all have desires and dreams we want to accomplish. For me, I think I'm always wondering how I can do meaningful work, which I believe does create a happier life. I'm currently in the middle of reading a book titled "Things That Matter," and the author talks about this a lot. He insists that we shouldn't be so focused on trying to retire early so we can start living our lives how we want. What a waste of our lives. And, I realize some people don't have all the choices available to them to pick and choose what jobs they want because they are just trying to make ends meet. But, again, what are those obstacles that are in our way that prevent us from living our best lives, from becoming our best selves?

I think an obvious answer is fear. Fear always holds me back from trying something outside of my comfort zone or something unknown. I like predictability. I like knowing there will always be a net to catch me if I fall. I get scared that I am not good enough or I will not have enough, that I won’t be taken care of or be able to take care of myself. What would I do differently if I wasn't fearful of how things would turn out?